Wednesday

Today SUCKS.

Here's to hoping that somehow, someway it all gets better....before I have a nervous breakdown.

Thanks for listening.

Tuesday

Bob Rocks!

I have to give Bob kudos for some totally awesome Christmas presents this year! With the pregnancy...it seemed it would be a bit of a challenge. However, he came through maybe the best he's ever done!

After a few presents were opened....I had a stack of books and CD's. He was bummed. I wasn't! I LOVE books! He bought me 4 of Robert Whitlow's books. I've never read his before. I'm sure they will be great! :)

He also bought me another Brandilynn Collins book. :) I LOVE LOVE LOVE her books! If you haven't gotten a chance to read them, come borrow some! I've read 6 now I believe. I am starting another series...and we have to finish buying it. I only have 2 of the 4 books needed. She writes fantastic...and none of her books parallel each other. They are all unique and different. And awesome! He was able to email her and get me autographs for each book. And bookmarks! It was a fantastic gift!

He also bought me 3 seasons of the Gilmore Girls...ON SALE. He's a great shopper!

AND he got me a digital photo frame for my desk. My girl scrolls picture after picture all day long! :) She's beautiful and I find myself smiling or giggling over certain pictures (I did that when I pulled up the blog and there she is in the sink with her hair sticking up...and looking oh so happy!).

AND he got me aloe socks. :) They are so soft and comfortable!

He put so much thought into my gifts...wanting to get me good stuff. :) He did a great job. Everything he bought I will be able to use and enjoy. :)

Thanks, sweetie :)

Merry 5 days after Christmas! :) OR should I say Happy New Year's Eve Eve. :) hehe

Monday

Heartbroken...

I am absolutely heartbroken today. After 10 wonderfully fantastic days off with my girl, I had to go back to work. It was an awesome vacation and an awesome awesome Christmas with her. She amazes me more and more every day. I miss spending our days playing, hugging, laughing, and just soaking up as much of her as I can. I'll fill everyone in on our Christmas in more detail when the thought of doing it doesn't make me want to cry.

She's my girl. My awesome girl.

Here's a few pics of her....They'll definately make you smile :)

She loved playing with Santa Claus...though he would occassionally get decapitated...


Just IMAGINE the scheming in those eyes!...


Christmas morning at home....(Post haircut...you can see in the prior pics she needed it!)...


Christmas Eve at Grandma Parsons....she LOVED the rocking horse and cowgirl hat...The pointing her hand like a gun is all her!



Scroll down to the next post for a few more pictures!

A Few More Pics....

I couldn't help but post more!

She LOVES her George...and crackers... :)


Loves to have her picture taken!...


WE had fun with her bath....though I don't think SHE did!...


Cute picture...that hair!...

Friday

Kids....

Oh my lands, they are hilarious! We help with 4-5 year olds in Awana on Wed. nights. There are two boys in that class that were particularly interested in my rapidly growing belly. Some of their comments and questions cracked me up! They wanted to know:

Is he really in there??? "Yes, he's in there."
Does he have a name??? "Yes, his name is Alex." You already named him!? they said.
What does it feel like? Does it hurt??? "Nope, it sort of....tickles...."
There's not a real baby in there! It's a fake baby! (Then one of them wanted to punch my belly). "No, no. There's a REAL baby in there."

They were so funny! Back in October one of them asked me where babies come from....You get alot of detailed questions when you're pregnant around such young children! It was a very enjoyable night with all of those kids. When I stop helping, I'm going to miss them!

Tuesday

We Remember...

Three years ago at 1:10 a.m. this morning, Emily was delivered - 5 inches long...1 1/2 oz. So small. Too small. We said goodbye before we got to say hello. It was such a horrible night. Then we we were faced with a decision we never expected...whether or not to see her. No one could prepare me for making that decision. It was a struggle of my heart like no other. I had in my head all these visions of Emily that had formed...what should I do??? We prayed about it and prayed about it. We decided against it. Part of me feels like it was the right thing to do. She wouldn't have looked as I would have expected. No one could prepare me for what I was going to see. Bob says it was the right decision too. But there's that part in me....the mommy part, I guess....that feels like I SHOULD have seen her. No matter how different she would have looked...I should have done it. That's a regret that I have to live with. Wondering if I made the right decision.

What would she have looked like growing up? Would she have had my brown hair? I think so. I always thought so. She would have been one beautiful girl. What would her laugh have been like? Her cry? What would her mannerisms have been? What would be her favorite things to do? There are so many special things about Maleah....and I know Emily would have had her own set of special things....and it kills me that I'll never know what they would have been. I can only imagine what could have been with her.

I don't remember much beyond that morning. I remember getting enough pain killers to sleep. I remember my mom on one side and Bob on the other....all night....never leaving me. I remember the chaplain coming in and referring to my lost child as a "fetus". That made me so mad. I remember my doctor coming in. I remember getting my box with my tiny memories of her. Ultrasound pictures. A blanket someone crocheted just her size. Her footprints....her tiny, tiny footprints. I remember being wheeled down to leave that hospital....nothing to hold but a tiny box of memories on my lap. While mothers get to leave with their babies that was all I got to take with me. I remember Bec calling on the ride home....then nothing. I remember absolutely NOTHING about the remainder of that day. Too much pain too remember, I guess.

We had her creamated. They did it for free. Her ashes were scattered at the base of a beautiful magnolia that we planted in our backyard on her due date, May 26th. That same day we planted her tree we announced to all our friends and family that we were expecting again. It was a bittersweet day. We also took all the memories we have of our angel and made a shadowbox. I've posted it below. There are ultrasound pictures, the blanket made for her, her tiny footprints in the top left, and the ornament that Nicole & KJ got us that year for our tree....parents to be....

My heart shattered that year, but somehow God in His magnificent glory found a way to mend it. Thank you, Lord.

Monday

Another Sad Day...

Three years ago today we made the dreaded trip up to Riverside Hospital so I could deliver Emily. It was a DREADED trip. I knew it had to be done, but hated that I had to do it. My mom and Bob took me up. It was a quiet ride. I won't mention alot about that day. It was long. Painful...both emotionally and physically. Silly me, in all of my optimism, had to have the nurses do one more ultrasound....just to make sure that they were right...that my baby was really gone...There was that part of me that just thought they'll do that ultrasound and she'll be fine and I'll be able to go home...No mother should ever have to go through that. Going through labor pain after labor pain knowing that there's no joy once it stops.

I'm thankful that Bob was by my side. I'm thankful that my mom was by my side. That my dad came when he got off work and stayed all evening. That Nicole and K.J. came up to see us with the kids. That Bob's parents came and stayed until Emily was delivered. You never know how you're going to react to a situation until it happens. I needed the distractions. I needed PEOPLE. And they were there for me. Seeing everyone there made an unbearable day more bearable (if that makes any sense).

One of the things that stands out the most about that day is Pam. Pam was one of my many wonderful nurses. I had been put on painkillers...and was a little fuzzy. I remember her big, beautiful smile as I introduced her to Bob. Turns out it was the THIRD time I had done that. That's something I can remember about that day that doesn't hurt so badly. But for the most part, I try not to think about that day. The hurt, the pain, the remembering....it's too much.

This experience in my life showed me just how powerful God is. He got me through it. He gave me the strength to wait as long as I had to to deliver her. He gave me the strength to suffer through that day. He gave me the strength to deliver her. I could never have done it without Him carrying me...and that He placed two loving people on my right and on my left to never leave my side...

Thank you, Lord, for getting me through that day and the painful days to come. I never could have done it on my own. I know You carried me. I never could have walked that path. Thank you, Lord. I love You.

Sunday

A Sad Day...

Today has been a sad day. It's been 3 years since the checkup appointment when I found out my precious angel was gone. Three years seems like so long ago and not so much all at the same time. It hurts. Today it really hurts. Memories can be your best friend or your worst enemy. Today, they're my enemy. Today Christmas is sad to me. Today so many little things remind me of that day. It hurts deep inside. I know it'll get better...it always does. This morning, I didn't want to get out of bed. I can't help but remember that day. Being at home...Maleah napping...a quiet afternoon...too much time to think.

That's why humor is my defense mechanism. I don't like to hurt. She'll be up soon...we'll have a fun rest of our day...and in a few days the "remembering" days will be passed for another year. For now, I just have to pray that God will take that pain away, make these next 2.5 days easier. Make the memories fade...

That day three years ago, I don't remember if it was sunny or cloudy. I remember it was cold. I remember leaving that doctor's office all by myself and having to call Bob at work to tell him the bad news...I remember going to my mom's work and having to tell her...I remember calling Kathy at work, knowing she was the only boss who would ever understand the hurt I was going through. I remember telling Becky, Jaclyn, Stacy, Nicole, so many others... and feeling like a failure. I couldn't protect my daughter. I couldn't give her life. She was gone. I remember it was one of the longest days of my life. I remember Bob, my wonderful, wonderful husband, knowing me so well....knowing that going home that evening, her still being IN me but not WITH me...that I needed a distraction. We stopped at Walmart when we left my mom's that night...terrified to go home...and bought Season 1 of The Office. Anything to not allow me to sit there. And think. I love him so much for that small thing he did for me. He got me through that night.

I remember laying on the couch, crying, so sad....and the revelation that I had from God that He had blessed me with her...and she had been mine for 17 weeks because He allowed it to be so...and for reasons unknown to me He had deemed her too perfect for this world. I don't ask why. I never have. I never will. I am thankful to Him that I had her as long as I did. I was able to feel her move, if only just once, it was one more time than I should have been able to.

Thank you, Lord, for the blessings You have given me. For my beautiful angel, for my Maleah, and for the new life inside me. Protect Alex, keep him safe until he is born to us. Help him to grown to be healthy and strong. Shield me from the hurt and pain as the memories flow through my mind. Help me be strong, Lord. I love You so much. I pray that through these events, through the strength only You can provide, someone will see what a Rock You are...and come to know you, Lord. In Jesus Name.

Friday

Blogging

There's something awesome and cathartic about blogging. It's a healing sense to your soul. It's sort of like a diary, journal and life stories all rolled into one. It's nice. Here lately, you would think I am the only person who blogs...mine seems to be so intriguing to so many people. Shockingly, I didn't create it, nor was I the Christopher Columbus of discovering the blogosphere. It's a blogosphere because so many people do it. I do it. Bob does it. Bec does it. My Aunt Mary does it. In fact, so many people do it, that even with all my hits I've had recently, my blog is still ranked almost 4,000. Bob has one that's just over 4,000 and another that is over 12,000 that he gave up on a long time ago. I'm not sure what Bec's is, but if the people at work find hers as well, then I assume she'll really start increasing in rank too :)

I love blogging. I really do. My family and friends can read it. They can catch up on Alex updates, Maleah updates, or just US updates.

I hope all my friendly readers keep coming back too. I like having you around! :)

Irked...

You know something that really irks me? I love ABC Family during Christmas. They do the 25 Days of Christmas, and every evening are supposed to show Christmas movies, cartoons, etc...for those 25 days in December.

This year they did a countdown TO the 25 Days of Christmas and added an extra week or two of movies. I was so excited! I love Christmas and all the Christmas movies! What irks me is that during their 25 Days....and remember, it's ONLY 25 days....they are showing Harry Potter and Chronicles of Narnia....Now, come on! I'm sure there are many like me, who during this time, would love to see Home Alone, The Santa Clause, and many many more CHRISTMAS movies...

Like Bob says, snow in a movie does NOT make it a Christmas movie!

So that's my irk for the day. :)

Wednesday

Christmas....

My boss and I were talking a few days ago about all the nostalgia associated with Christmas. It seems like everyone has things that they do or watch or listen to that take them back to their fondest memories of Christmas.

My biggest one is The Oak Ridge Boys Christmas albums. My mom and dad would always play their songs on Christmas morning while we were opening our gifts. Every year, right before Christmas, it is a MUST to listen to those songs! Happy Christmas Eve, Christmas Carol, It's Christmas....these are some of the songs that I hear and it immediately takes me back to home as a child. I remember sitting in the living room at night with all the lights off and the tree lit, just enjoying the moment. Christmas is by far the most wonderful time of the year....it's definately the most magical.

I also have to watch a Charlie Brown Christmas, Rudolph, Frosty the Snowman and even Garfield Christmas (It was on ABC Family last night actually). These were some of the most watched shows in our house. We also would sit in the living room and listen to the Scooby Doo Christmas on the stereo as well as the songs about Mixie-Pixie, I'm Gettin' Nothin' for Christmas, Alvin & the Chipmunks, etc. These were routine things we did almost every year.

I think of these every year, and still try to watch and listen to all I can that takes me back to those days. Not that I can complain about these days...we'll create memories for Maleah and Alex that I hope they will carry with them throughout their lives as well.

:) Merry Christmas! :)

Monday

Confession #80

O Holy Night....

Ok. This is embarrassing. I'm 27, and I just figured this out LAST YEAR. And the ONLY reason I figured it out is because during the Singing Christmas Tree we were lucky enough to have the words on the back screen....otherwise I would STILL be in the dark!

The line that says..."And in His name, all oppression shall cease."
I always thought it said..."And in His name, all the presents shall cease."

I had NO idea WHY those were the words....but that's what I thought it was! SO SAD!

Man, I am an IDIOT!

I should kneel down and kiss Bob's feet every night that he still loves me after all of this stuff! :)
(Don't get your hopes up, Hon, SOOOO NOT going to happen!)

Friday

Live Like You Were Dying

The month of November at church we did a series "Live Like You Were Dying". We had devotionals, it was the focus of Sunday School and Pastor did his sermons on the topic as well. It's a fantastic series, and I would recommend it to anyone.

It really makes you reflect...if I had only 30 days to live...what would I do?

I realized I wouldn't care to go sight-seeing, I wouldn't want to go around the world (or just the country) and see beautiful sights, I wouldn't try daring things such as jumping out of an airplane, I wouldn't even care to go to the ocean one last time. Though I don't fault those who would WANT to do those things, I can't take those experiences with me anyways, so to me....what would be the point???

So what WOULD I want to do? What I should be doing now. Spending time with those I love. Telling everyone I can about Jesus. About His Saving Grace. About how very easy it is to receive salvation. About the truth in Him. It's hard to do. Suprisingly harder when it's people that are close to you. I have dear friends and family whom I have not actually TALKED to about Jesus. What do I have to be afraid of? They aren't rejecting ME...they're rejecting HIM. I have to have faith in knowing that I cannot save them, but I MUST make sure they KNOW.

Funny how the world gets in the way of these things.
This has been a weird week for me. I haven't let it get me down. I WON'T let it get me down. I can't please everyone, and as much as I would LOVE to get along with everyone...this week has shown that that will probably never happen. No matter what my intentions are...other's intentions may be different. So all I can do is live my life with no regrets, express apologies and ask forgiveness where necessary, and forgive others who have wronged me so badly and hurt me so deeply that they will never understand. That's hard to do. That's what I am working on now. Please pray for me for this. I want to be all the Lord would have me to be...and I don't want to get in His way.


Thanks for listening. :)

Tuesday

Alexander James

We got to see Alex in a new ultrasound yesterday! It was our 20 week ultrasound. He was so awesome! He moved all over! It looked like he was dancing, and in one it looked like he was singing! Towards the end of the LONG session, he must have gotten exhausted because he put his arm up by his head, and started sucking his thumb (SO CUTE!).

Here he is!

He's a HE!:


He looks like he has a lovey...:


He was jamming to his own tune...and singing along: :)


One exhausted baby putting himself to bed!:

Monday

SNOW!

It SNOWED this morning! Not like flurry snow, but like big, fat, beautiful flakes of snow! It stuck to the grass and the cars and everything! It's gone for now. SNOW!!!!

THAT is why we decorate for Christmas early!

Also, have you ever noticed how when it's snowing outside, it just seems to make the cold air a bit more tolerable? I walked into work with a smile on my face this morning (not to mention alot of snow flakes). :)

Thursday

CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!!

I am SOOOO excited for it! We have our tree up (not shaped or decorated but it's UP!). We have our decorations out, we're hopefully going to decorate the outside soon (and by we I mean BOB). ;) Maleah will get her own tree this year, to share with her baby brother in future years too. They will be able to decorate it with their own ornaments and have fun with it. I am so excited about that! We are going to watch a Christmas DVD this evening while we finish decorating. I AM SOOOOO READY FOR CHRISTMAS!!!!

You should be too!

Forget about the COST. It's the MOST wonderful time of the year! Everyone is in a better mood, happy, cheery. It's a celebration of Christ's birth. It's fun with friends and family. The time between Thanksgiving and Christmas in the best time of the year! I think we should move Thanksgiving UP so that the Christmas "season" lasts longer!

Bob said the people in Columbus are being scrooges about Christmas. Well, BAH-HUMBUG!

Here in Chillicothe.........IT'S CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday

Cialis

Yes, this post is about Cialis. No, it's not a mistake!

We've seen these Cialis commercials for months, I mean MONTHS. I have to tell you what bothers me about them. They're about taking pills for "intimate moments" with your spouse, right??? So why in the WORLD do they show a man and woman sitting in two separate bath tubs at the end??? Just curious. That's really been bothering me. I just don't get it. Of course, when they show them in the tubs, the tubs are also outdoors....so that should bother me too. I just don't get it!

If you care to shed light on why...leave a comment and tell me!

Monday

Sweet Little Jesus Boy

Sweet Little Jesus Boy is another of the songs on the Casting Crowns Christmas cd. Though other artists have sung the song, this may be the first time I have heard it. Atleast the first time I have LISTENED to it. It got me thinking. The chorus of the song goes:


Didn't know You'd come to save us all
To take our sins away
Our eyes were blind we did not see
We didn't know who You were


It's funny how much the world has changed, isn't it? When Jesus was born, they didn't know who He was, they didn't realize He was our SAVIOR. And then you look at today. Today people don't WANT to know who Jesus is. They don't WANT to call Him SAVIOR. It's not that we ARE blind so much as we WANT to be blind. People don't WANT to know Jesus. Don't want to own up to their sins. Don't want to admit that they cannot save themselves. Don't want to admit that they need HIM. Well, I NEED HIM. I can't do it without HIM. If you don't know Him, I wish you would. People seem to think that salvation is so difficult. It's not. It's so SIMPLE. We MAKE it so difficult. I'm not perfect and I certainly don't have all the answers. But there is one answer I DO have. It's JESUS. Say His name aloud. JESUS. It's the most beautiful name to ever grace your lips. Saying it aloud makes it all the more real that He is SO CLOSE YOU CAN FEEL HIM!

If you haven't heard the song...here are the lyrics. Read them. Then listen to it. It's a beautiful, beautiful song.

Sweet Little Jesus Boy:

Sweet little Jesus boy, born in a manger
Sweet little Holy child, we didn't know who You were
Long time ago it seems You were born
Born in a manager Lord, sweet little Jesus boy

Didn't know you'd come to save us all
To take our sins away
Our eyes were blind we did not see
We didn't know who You were

You have shown us how
And we are trying
Master You have shown us how
Even as You were dying
This world treats You mean Lord
Treats me mean too
But that's how things are done down here
We didn't know it was You

Didn't know You'd come to save us all
To take our sins away
Our eyes were blind we did not see
We didn't know who You were

Thursday

Prayer Request

Please remember this young man's friend and roommate in your prayers...

From Clay Stamper

My roommate Will (Bruening) has pancreatic cancer--which is one of the worst to have. Please pray for him. He's taking chemo and radiation and seems to go back and forth between optimism and accepting eventual death... It's a ridiculous situation that he doesn't deserve. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE pass this on to every prayer chain you know of. I've sort of been on a "prayer regimine," and I try to pray once every hour (which usually amounts to whenever I think about it) that God will remove his cancer or at least give him a decent amount of time...

Wednesday

A Mixed Bag...

Today I am filled with many emotions. I am sad that John McCain lost. I am frustrated that the democrats will have complete control in Washington. I am truly sad that in just two months, President Bush will no longer be our president. I am irritated that on the news this morning, they were already calling Obama "President Obama", not even "President-Elect" just "President" and it's irritating because people can't even muster up enough decency and respect to call our current president PRESIDENT Bush. Regardless of the feelings you may have towards our president, he has worked very hard these last 8 years. I hear people complain all the time about how much they can't stand him, and there is so much hatred there....You know what? One - he is our president. Any president we have deserves respect. When Obama takes office, I don't have to agree with him, but I can respect him as our president if nothing else. Two - how many times have we been attacked in the last 7 years???? People neglect the fact that President Bush has kept us safe on our own soil since the Sept. 11th attacks. For that we should ALL be grateful.

I am also very excited because Issue 6 was voted down and GEORGE LAVENDER IS SHERIFF!!!! WOO-HOO!!!!

I've had a hard time since last night. I stopped watching the election coverage when Obama won Ohio. We watched Gilmore Girls instead. I needed something light. Something to take my mind off of my disappointment. As I look ahead, I have two months to get to the point of accepting that whether I like it or not, things are going to change. I don't like change, especially not change that I don't even desire. But it's going to come. So we need to pray for Barack Obama and everyone in Washington.

We need to pray that:
...he is kept safe from harm.
...he will make more moderate decisions as president.
...he will work with the republicans and not just dominate with far left decisions.
...he will NOT put into effect the Freedom of Choice Act.
...he will NOT pull the troops out of Iraq & Afghanistan.
...he will make Godly decisions, constantly communicating with God to be sure that he is following God's will.
...he will be humbled with this position.

There's alot more we'll need to pray for. Make your prayer list and pray. Dedicate yourself to it. Sometimes I feel like God doesn't hear us...but then I stop and wonder, are we really crying out to Him? Or do we just accept whatever is before us? There's alot I'm afraif of. I have to rely on God to take that fear away, knowing regardless of who is president, He is still in control. I think it's important we all remember that.

You don't have to get on the Obama-wagon....but when he steps into office on Jan. 20th, accept him as your president. (Wow. That was SOOO hard to say!) :)

Thanks for listening. Sorry if it was a mess....that's sort of how I am today.

Tuesday

I Voted Today....

...and LOVED it! Regardless of what the outcome is, I feel so good that I cast my vote for McCain/Palin today! It's a beautiful day. The leaves are gorgeous, the sun is shining, the air is warm. It's just a FANTASTIC day!!!

Moving, Moving, Moving!

This little guy moved around SOOOO much yesterday, and last night his kicks were really fierce. He may be as fiesty as Maleah after all :) Bob got to feel him kick (or POP is a better word). :) It was AWESOME! :)

Monday

All Smiles :)

I could just sit and feel him move all day! It's the greatest feeling in the world! :) His kicks, for being so tiny, can also be sort of fierce! :) I'm so thankful I've been able to feel him move so much today. Bob can vouch for me...there are times I get sort of spazzy about worrying if I don't feel him kick. God has certainly blessed my Monday! :)

Will We Be Sleeping???

I heard this song today. It's actually on Casting Crowns Christmas album. I've heard it alot before. I thought of the election when I heard it this morning. I thought of where we already are as a nation. I thought of where we're headed. I truly think that we WILL be sleeping. I think we're going to miss it. Our country is literally going to Hell before our very eyes. Sins are no longer seen as sins. Christ is no longer present, for we have squeezed Him out of our lives. People are no longer turning to Him. Soon, there'll be nothing left. We'll become another nation that God sees as not worth saving. And I have to say....after looking around....I don't blame Him if He does. But you know what? I don't WANT to miss it. I don't want our country to miss it. If we'd all just open our eyes...

"While You Were Sleeping" - Casting Crowns

Oh little town of Bethlehem
Looks like another silent night
Above your deep and dreamless sleep
A giant star lights up the sky
And while you're lying in the dark
There shines an everlasting light
For the King has left His throne
And is sleeping in a manger tonight

Oh Bethlehem, what you have missed while you were sleeping
For God became a man
And stepped into your world today
Oh Bethlehem, you will go down in history
As a city with no room for its King
While you were sleeping
While you were sleeping

Oh little town of Jerusalem
Looks like another silent night
The Father gave His only Son
The Way, the Truth, the Life had come
But there was no room for Him in the world He came to save

Jerusalem, what you have missed while you were sleeping
The Savior of the world is dying on your cross today
Jerusalem, you will go down in history
As a city with no room for its King
While you were sleeping
While you were sleeping

United States of America
Looks like another silent night
As we're sung to sleep by philosophies
That save the trees and kill the children
And while we're lying in the dark
There's a shout heard 'cross the eastern sky
For the Bridegroom has returned
And has carried His bride away in the night

America, what will we miss while we are sleeping
Will Jesus come again
And leave us slumbering where we lay
America, will we go down in history
As a nation with no room for its King
Will we be sleeping
Will we be sleeping

United States of America
Looks like another silent night

Thursday

Baby (Boy) Update!

We had our 17 week checkup yesterday for our little one. He is doing well. Heart rate was 147. :) In three weeks we get to find out "for sure" what he is. Like we don't already know! :) I'd be SHOCKED, SHOCKED if he were anything different, than, well, a HE! It'll be awesome to get another 4D ultrasound though. I just ask that you be praying for him that his development is strong.

Also, please pray for me. I have seen some slight swelling in my legs already. It started later than this with Maleah and got terrible, and I really don't want to go through that sort of swelling again!

Pray for Stacy too. She's needing alot of prayers so that she can get pregnant again quickly. They're ready for their next, and we all want them to get it NOW! :)

Also, for Nicole and Bobby...they're in the home stretch...and soon their world will turn upside down....in a wonderfully fantastic way!

I guess we'd better pray for my parents too. :) With all these little grandchildren, they'll need it! ;)

Monday

Thankful

I posted a post venting all of my frustration. I also have alot to be thankful for. I think it would also be therapeutic to name some of those as well...

I am thankful...

...that God didn't give up on me.
...that He never does.
...that Jesus provides saving Grace.
...that we can't save ourselves.
...that we don't have to.
...that God blessed me with my angel Emily.
...that I got to have her with me for 17 weeks.
...that God blessed me with Maleah.
...that God blessed me with little baby A.J.
...that He has kept us all healthy...including me and the baby.
...for Bob.
...because I don't know what I'd ever do without him.
...because he never stops loving me.
...that he never leaves my side.
...that he tries so hard to do what's right.
...that our children will never have go grow up in a broken home.
...that I can be certain of that.
...that I have a family that loves me and is there for me.
...that I have a church family to turn to in prayer and praise.
...that I have a mom and dad that are ALWAYS there for me.
...that I have a mom and dad that have shown hard work and never giving up my entire life.
...that I have a mom and dad that always put us first.
...that I have a best friend I can turn to with any prayer request, and know she'll be praying hard, no matter how long it's been since I talked to her.
...that I have a best friend at work that I couldn't get through my days without.
...that I have a house to keep me warm and safe.
...that I have a job that provides me with all of my needs and some of my wants.
...that I get to see Maleah's smiling face every single day (even if she won't call me Mommy).
...that one minute with Maleah erases all the bad moments in my day.
...that I get to hear her beautiful voice.
...that God would even bless me with such an opportunity in this life as to keep that child in my presence and raise her for Him.
...that I have been able to feel the baby move alot today :)
...that God blessed me with so much good in a world so bad.
...that no matter what happens with the election, God is still in control. Whether it's to give us over to our sin, or attempt to save our country....HE IS IN CONTROL. (I have to remember that!)
...for the sunny days.
...even moreso for many of the cloudy days.
...for the smell of fall.
...for the sound of rain falling.
...for the flowers in the spring.
...to witness Maleah appreciate the flowers she sees.
...that she likes to stop and smell them...every time she sees them....and I mean EVERY TIME :)
...for Sudoku.
...for The Office.
...for football.
...for pizza and other "junk" food.
...for music. I can't sing, but I can sure enjoy it :)
...for a sense of humor. I didn't know I had one until I met Bob. He unleashed a beast ;)
...for the opportunity to write this.
...that you listened.

Frustrated

I am to the point that I am SOOOOO frustrated with the election, with politics, with people, with our country in general.

I am frustrated...

...that this presidential campaign has become an issue of race.
...that the American people no longer seem to care about experience.
...that the youth in America see the presidential race as more of a popularity contest, many knowing nothing or very little about the issues.
...that no one values life anymore...atleast not HUMAN life. Threaten a boy's life for killing a pig, sure. But don't you dare threaten the pig!
...that no one values each other.
...that Colin Powell endorsed Obama.
...that the media is so one-sided.
...that many people base their decisions on whatever the media reports.
...that stars think they know it all.
...that they spread their hatred of our country and our President all over the world, and think it's ok.
...that our country is so filled with hate.
...that I have seen racism in this election and it is more black to white than the other way around.
...that I feel like I will be busted out just for typing that.
...that we can't always say what we feel.
...that the media tore apart Joe the Plumber...HE ONLY ASKED A QUESTION!!!
...that there are still 15 days left in this stupid election.
...that the democrats will control the White House, House and Senate if Obama wins.
...that there will be NO accountability...no checks and balances.
...that our country has become a pit of filth.
...that we have buried ourselves so deep in our sin as a country that God will soon turn us over to all of that sin, and there will be NO light.
...that the moral values in our country are dissipating.
...that abortion is allowed.
...that women can kill their babies at 17 weeks gestation.
...that I went thru so much pain losing Emily at 17 weeks and women take those lives away VOLUNTARILY.
...that no one wants to give a baby rights.
...that includes Obama.
...that everyone refers to a baby as a "fetus". It's a BABY. A BABY!!!
...that women get off on killing their husbands after 1-3 years but men get life.
...that about 90% of the black vote is going to Obama.
...that people will say that that's ok.
...that the economy is so bad.
...that everyone blames Bush...there's ALOT of blame to go around. He is one of MANY.
...that we, as Christians, don't stand up for Christ anymore.
...that we, as Christians, don't WITNESS like we should.
...that we are letting our country go to Hell right before our very eyes.
...that I have become so jaded by the world that I feel there is no hope left for our country. Morality is leaving, people want to do whatever they want and that's all that matters to them. That everyone is all about what can YOU do for ME, not the other way around. That we are all selfish. That there's no fear of God, no call to Christ. That no one turns to Him. Everyone turns FROM Him. That no one sees that HE is the answer. And that we, as Christians, are failing to SHOW them that HE is the answer.

The last thing I am frustrated about...

...that I almost didn't submit this post because it may be a controversial one.

Vote NO on Issue 6

Don't believe everything you hear on TV. Don't just listen to the ads. Read the detail for yourself. If you go to the website below, you can read some of the major problems involved with Issue 6. I have copied and pasted a portion from the website below. Our state could sell out in greed, and end up getting NOTHING.

http://www.votenocasinos.com/index.html

Lyle Berman has also connected the dots on this casino scam. His language in Issue 6 specifically creates a trap door in the tax formula so that the "up to 30%" tax on his casino monopoly is instantly re-adjusted downward if state or federal law permits another casino in the state. He specifically included the words "federal law" in the Ohio ballot language, anticipating a federal ruling to sanction tribal casinos. Here is how the trap door works:

1) Ohio Issue 6 passes in November making Ohio a Class III gambling state and giving Berman his Ohio casino in Wilmington.
2) The Secretary of the Interior then authorizes the Eastern Shawnee to open a casino in Ohio
3) Federal law specifically prohibits the taxation of a tribal casino or tribal lands by the State or localities.
4) Therefore Berman's Ohio casino tax rate is immediately dropped to the same level as the competing tribal casino which just happens to be zero.
5) Once a competing casino springs the trap door the automatic tax reduction leaves every Ohio county left holding an empty bag of promised casino revenues.

This last point is critical for every Ohio County Commissioner to understand. The promises of shared casino revenues being made to Ohio's 88 counties will be wiped out by this tax trap door contained in Ohio Issue 6. Any additional form of casino gambling permitted by the state or federal government in Ohio will immediately diminish revenues promised to Ohio counties by backers of Issue 6.

This scam was exposed by the Vote NO Casinos Committee at a Statehouse news conference on Friday, August 22, 2008. By the end of that day, the official backers of Ohio ballot Issue 6 conceded their language did in fact contain such a trap door. The Columbus Dispatch stated "The group's leaders admitted today that they erred by including wording that could lower the tax rate to zero and said they were working on wording to fix that."

There is just one problem with that statement: Once a flawed constitutional measure is on the ballot, it cannot be changed. If Ohio Issue 6 passes it will take a second constitutional amendment to change it. By that time, casino gambling will be legal in Ohio, the Shawnee will press to open their casinos, and in the pursuing "casino chaos" Lyle Berman and his friends will be buried by big-time casino developers who have better lawyers.

Thursday

Fact Check

If you're anything like me you are tired of the run-around between the candidates. I'm tired of the "He said-He said" and the "He said-She said" and the "She said-He said". I'm frustrated with "You said this..." "No, I didn't. I said this..." "No, you didn't...." I'm tired of the negative ads from both sides. I'm tired of the candidates not being able to just voice where they stand.

So do you want to just know the facts? Like me, you can't get away from all the ads and back and forth, but you CAN get some answers out of them.

Go to www.factcheck.org. When you wonder who is telling the truth, this website will let you know every bit of truth and falsehood that you run across.

Just remember...One month to go!

Go McCain! :)

The Weight has been Lifted!

Pastor's message on Sunday took a weight of my shoulders that I'm not even sure I knew was there. He spoke on witnessing, and on what is expected of us as Christians to witness. You know what??? We don't have to save people. We don't have to have all the answers. We don't have to debate theology. We don't have to tell them our church doctrine. ALL WE HAVE TO DO IS TELL THEM ABOUT JESUS!

WHAT A RELIEF!

I didn't realize how much I am afraid to talk to people about Christ. I didn't realize the fear I had in someone asking a question I can't answer. I didn't realize the fear I had in not knowing all the answers. I don't have to.

Romans Road
The ABCs

These are important. If someone wants to debate theology, I'm most definately not the one to do it! But I can tell them about Christ and what he did for all of us. It's really simple. It's amazingly simple.

I hope that I will become stronger about talking to people in my life who are unsaved, knowing I don't have to save them. It's not our job to save people. It IS our job to tell them about Christ. God will work on their heart from there.

AMEN to that!

Monday

She Is Her Mommy's Baby...

This is Maleah, taken within the last month:




This is me, taken years ago:



It completely amazes me just how much she looks like me! I am so proud (and feel so bad for her for what's to come)! :)

She is her mommy's baby! :)

Wednesday

Love Song

I've heard this song so many times I couldn't even begin to count, but today I heard it, and I just had to sit still and listen intently. It's such a beautiful song. We will NEVER understand the price Christ paid for us, but He loves us so much He WOULD do it again...and again...and again...I wish people could see how much He loves them...even those that think they're unloveable...even those that don't believe...It's SOOOO easy!

For jut a few seconds, read these words...truly thinking about what they mean.

Third Day "Love Song"

I've heard it said that a man would climb a mountain
Just to be with the one he loves
How many times has he broken that promise
It has never been done.
I've never climbed the highest mountain
But I walked the hill of calvary

Chorus:
Just to be with you, I'd do anything
There's no price I would not pay
Just to be with you, I'd give anything
I would give my life away.

I've heard it said that a man would swim the ocean
Just to be with the one he loves
How may times has he broken that promise
It can never be done
I've never swam the deepest ocean
But I walked upon the raging sea

Chorus:
Just to be with you, I'd do anything
There's no price I would not pay
Just to be with you, I'd give anything
I would give my life away.

(Bridge)
I know that you don't understand
the fullness of My love
How I died upon the cross for your sins
And I know that you don't realize
how much that I gave you
But I promise, I would do it all again.

Just to be with you, I've done everything
There's no price I did not pay
Just to be with you, I gave everything
Yes, I gave my life away.

Tuesday

One for the Baby Books!

So, when I was pregnant with Maleah (we found out May 24). That summer, my Cavalier started dying on me...We took it to the auto shop. It was the alternator. Nearly $300 to fix it. THEN in the fall of that same year, while still pregnant with Maleah, Bob's Altima started dying...We took it to the auto shop. It was the alternator. Another $300 to fix it.

Two alternators. One pregnancy.

Enter August 1st (the day we find out we're pregnant with our baby). A few short weeks later Bob's Altima starts dying on us...We tow it to the auto shop. It was the alternator. AGAIN. Another $300. Saturday, Sept. 13th, we're all driving down Bridge Street, my Escape starts dying on us...We tow it to the auto shop. It was the alternator. Another $400!!!

Two alternators. One pregnancy.

I can't even be upset for the huge loss we have to take this month in paying for the cars...the situation itself is hilarious!

Who says God doesn't have a sense of humor???

Thursday

Nothing Shocks Me Anymore....

People never cease to amaze me with what they will say! That saying that God gave you two ears and one mouth so you can listen twice as much as you speak rings true here:

Democratic Rep. Steve Cohen riled Republicans Wednesday after he compared Barack Obama to Jesus Christ and suggested Sarah Palin is akin to Pontius Pilate. The Tennessee congressman and Obama supporter was on the House floor giving a one-minute speech when he offered the simile. “If you want change, you want the Democratic Party,” Cohen said. “Barack Obama was a community organizer like Jesus, who our minister prayed about. Pontius Pilate was a governor.”

There Will Be a Day

I heard this song on air1 this week and I LOVE IT! Absolutely LOVE IT. I wanted to share (sorry about the way the lyrics are on the page, I copied and pasted. :)

There Will Be A Day - Jeremy Camp:

Try to hold on to this world with everything I have
But I feel the weight of what it brings, and the hurt that trys to grab
The many trials that seem to never end, His word declares this truth,
that we will enter in this rest with wonders anew

But I hold on to this hope and the promise that He brings
That there will be a place with no more suffering

(Chorus)
There will be a day with no more tears, no more pain, and no more fears
There will be a day when the burdens of this place, will be no more,
we'll see Jesus face to face
But until that day, we'll hold on to you always

I know the journey seems so long
You feel you’re walking on your own
But there has never been a step
Where you’ve walked out all alone

(Chorus)

Troubled soul don’t lose your heart
Cause joy and peace He brings
And the beauty that’s in store
Outweighs the hurt of life’s sting

I can’t wait until that day where the very one I’ve lived for always will wipe away the sorrow that I’ve faced
To touch the scars that rescued me from a life of shame and misery this is why this is why I sing

Wednesday

Appointment

We had our first appointment yesterday, complete with a 4D ultrasound. :) Our baby, who will more than likely be called a she until we know for sure, was so beautiful! The heart rate was 175 (I think). I know it was in the 170s. I was so excited to see that baby IN there! I told Bob...doesn't matter that I took 10 pregnancy tests, until I see that baby I can hardly BELIEVE it! "She" was there. And just the one! Not multiple, as some may have hoped!

There are a couple of things we would like to ask you to pray for. One is a small cyst on one of my ovaries. The doctor isn't concerned, but still...and the second is that I have the same bleeding on my uterus just like what happened with Maleah. A fairly common event, but still something to be watched. No heavy lifting, and we have to have another ultrasound at our next appt., which is 4 weeks from today. I praise God for this though. With Emily, laying on that table at 17 weeks, waiting for him to find the heartbeat and not being able to, was the most heartbreaking thing in my life. With Maleah, we never had to do that. The ultrasound always came first. God was gracious in that. By the time we had to lay on the table, she was moving around to where I could feel her and know she was ok. Such a blessing that again, I don't have to lay on that table and wait to see if there's a heartbeat. I'm so thankful for that. Just pray that in the next month or two that spot will be gone, just as with Maleah, and that our baby will be healthy and strong.

I have experienced some awful nausea over the last few weeks. The doc prescribed me meds for that...and boy am I appreciative! I've been trying to follow the pregnancy diet, to eat more variety of small things that are healthy...and less milk shakes and french fries :) Pray for me in that as well! I don't want to gain 60 lbs. this time around! (Even if most of it WAS water weight!)

I'll keep updated!

Tuesday

The Weather

The weather this morning has been cool and cloudy with early morning thunderstorms. It has been a beautiful morning. I so treasure mornings like this. Soon, the clouds will give way to a sunny afternoon. It's a good thing, I know, but there's just something about the beautiful dark gray clouds that makes me happy. Weird, sure. But that's me, I guess :)

Monday

Enjoyable....

Here are a few lines I stumbled across today. I just wanted to share...:

"Don't just hope for change. VOTE FOR IT!" McCain-Palin

"McCain-Palin '08 - Keep the change."

"I'd rather have Sarah Palin a heartbeat away from the presidency, than have Barack Obama BE the heartbeat of the presidency."

They're on bumper stickers and t-shirts. Pretty funny stuff. :)

Thursday

Sarah Palin

She rocked last night. She gave a phenomenal speech...I hope you got to see it. Her youngest daughter is sweet as can be ... standing on the stage with her mom, waving so proudly to the crowd, not a care in the world. Bob and I got a big kick out of her for that. She was adorable. The speech was powerful and she delivered it better than anyone else could. It was an amazing night for her. If you didn't see it, I hope you get the chance.

The one bad thing I've discovered about the Republican Party? Their love for country music! Ugh! I'll get over it though! ;)

Monday

Save-A-Lot

If you are on the west end of town and want to save alot...go to Save-A-Lot the gas station. If you don't frequent the Kroger gas station to get the cents off...go down Western Ave. to the new Save-A-Lot gas station. I was going down Western this morning...Kroger $3.75, Marathon $3.72...Save-A-Lot...$3.53. You can't beat that!

I'm a Delong!

It's showing! I'm a Delong! I sit here, 27 years old, and this weekend I found a total of 8...yes EIGHT...gray hairs! I pulled them all. Don't tell me more will grow either! I debunked that. If that were true...older people wouldn't go bald! They'd be yanking those babies out to grow more hair! :)

All 8 hairs were on the right side of my head, too. I thought that was interesting. We'll call that "the Bob side" of my head ;)

Since Maleah won't call me Mommy, we'll just have to get her to start calling me Grandma instead :) hehe

I atleast crack myself up!

Maleah's Big News!

Thursday

Air1.com

I just want to share my radio station, www.air1.com. It's an awesome Christian alternative rock station and I have thoroughly enjoyed listening to it today (as I do every day). People are calling in with prayer requests, praying for one another, the station and listeners are praying for all these people in need...and isn't that what it's all about? There's no judgment on this station....just the Word and the news of Christ and His Salvation! It's AWESOME!

Give it a listen if you can. :)

Tuesday

Feeling Irritated....and also Thankful.

I appreciate all the people in my life...and in OUR lives...who love us because of who we are, and not because of what we can do for them. Some people will love you if you do what they want you to do, and hate you if you don't.

Thank you for all of you who read this that are not that type of person.

I hope you are all having a great day.

I miss being on here! I'll get back to it. :) Promise. :)

Don't Give Up on Us!

We'll be posting again real soon! We've just been so busy!
Keep checking!

Friday

Trip Pics - KI

Here are a few pictures from Kings Island...



Maleah with Bob on LazyTown (her first ride EVER)...

Maleah with me on Azul (look closely)...

Maleah with best bud, Pablo (you can see she's holding his fin)...

Maleah with Bob on the Merry-Go-Round (I took better pics than he did) :)...

Maleah on her way home (loving Ming-Ming)...

Trip Pics - Cincy Zoo

Here are a few zoo pics:

The polar bears were awesome...

You can see how excited Maleah was to be there... :)

Bob playing in the mist machine water (I would NEVER do that...)... ;)

The garden...

Maleah once she finally succombed to sleep...

Tuesday

Bugless

Maleah is bugless. She gave up her "Bug" (pacifier) Friday, 6/27. I took it from her when she woke up and she hasn't had it since. I am so proud of her. She has become such a big girl. :) (She throws big girl fits too) :)

I'll put alot more on about her and the house when we get some pictures available :)

A Sunday of Awesomeness (6/22)

This is long overdue....

Our Cincinnati trip continued....

We woke up to a baby that slept through the night. :) Bob went to get breakfast (a homemade waffle for me...and by homemade I mean the hotel provided the batter and Bob fixed the waffle). It was SOOOO good, and much better than FROZEN waffles! He had a danish and a muffin (I think). Maleah shared my food. After a good beating from the shower head, we were ready to head out to Kings Island.

Ah...Kings Island. The cicada's were out in full force. We took quite a beating from them throughout the day as well. We had to stand in line for the awesome free tickets. Then we had to go through the metal detectors...weird because I have never done that with a baby stroller before. Bob made fun of me because I made that comment to the dude checking us through, and he (the dude) sort of made fun of me. For crying out loud!

Once we were inside, we headed straight over to the kid's area...

Ah, the kid's area. It's huge and there were actually things for Maleah to do! She first rode the LazyTown ride with Bob. Then I took her on the merry-go-round. Then all 3 of us went on the Scooby Doo haunted ride. By the time we were done with those 3, she totally understood the waiting in line, and stopped trying to get down, understanding something great awaited her. From there, we stood and watched some of the Dora show (she looked like a cabbage patch kid). Then we went to lunch...

Ah....LUNCH. FREE LUNCH at that. We went to the picnic area, where we were greeted with BBQ pulled pork, chicken strips, chips, veggies, rolls, beans, pop (again, all free) and we even got to top off eating with a dessert of ice cream. It was all soooo good, and, FREE! When we were done eating, we headed back out. Maleah and I then rode Azul (train from Dora). From there we went to the store...

Ah...the store. Everything seemed reasonably priced. We got her a new Dora hat, and she picked out Ming-Ming from the Wonder Pets. Once she had Ming-Ming, she crashed, HARD. We walked around the park, getting hammered by the stupid cicada's and relishing the free pop (all day long free pop) :) When she woke up, we got on the park train and took a ride, then went back to the Merry-Go-Round again. It rained, so we hung out under an umbrella while Maleah had her cookies. When it stopped, the line was free for LazyTown, so we all rode it this time around. After walking around the rest of the park, it looked like another storm was headed our way, so we decided to go to McD's for dinner before heading home....

Ah...McD's...so good. Their sweet tea is just awesome and the food was good too. I was so proud of Maleah. She did so well all day :) Then we headed home, she slept the whole way... (we'll get pictures on, they're adorable). Then we got home...

Ah...Home. :)

Sunday

Out of Commission

FROM BOB - Miranda and I will be out of commission on our blogs all week. I'll be unhooking the computer in about 5 minutes due to some home improvements we have going on. We're needing to clear out the rooms to make way for new carpet, paint, etc. We'll put pics up and new blogs once we're back "online". Thanks!

Monday

A Saturday of Awesomeness!

We had a fantastic weekend! A weekend to get away on our "vacation" for the year...to forget about the house, or work, or anything else going on and just relax, enjoying our weekend together.

We went down to Cincinnati on Saturday to the Zoo, then booked a hotel to stay all night because Time Warner (the totally awesome company that it is!) sponsored for it's employees a day at Kings Island on Sunday.

We left early Saturday morning, around 8:15 and had a safe trip to the zoo. The Cincinnati Zoo is by far the most awesome place! It was hot, but it was fun! I think our favorites were the polar bears and the jungle area (which was made to look more like a jungle than a zoo). There were mist machines, which helped keep us cool (aside from Maleah wigging out around one of them). We really just had a great time. When we left there, we went to the hotel.

The Hotel...Maleah is definately a Speakman. Bob has always loved hotels, so much so that he wanted to work in one when he was younger (hehe). Maleah was having a blast running from one end of the room to the other, kissing the baby in the mirror, and trying her hardest to hurt herself by running off the end of the bed (that was exhausting). :) She got a bath and then it was off to dinner...

Ahhh....Cracker Barrel (and cheaper than food at the zoo!). You get hefty portions of delicious food with excellent service. Serve that up with a good baby and a fantastic thunderstorm to watch from the giant window and it's all the fixings for a perfect dinner! The gift shop presented us with Maleah falling in love with a Ty Diego doll (miniature), so of course we HAD to get it for her! It WAS a vacation, after all! From there we were going to go to Target...but Barnes & Noble got in the way!

The beauty of Barnes & Noble. We'd never been to one before...but the children's area was enough to make us want to go back. We saw book upon book that we wanted to buy for Maleah...but she only walked away with 3. Can't call it spoiled when it encourages reading! She had a blast in there too! From there we decided to go back to the hotel, where Maleah was in bed by 9 and slept until 7. I cannot express how proud we were of her. We kept the routine that we have at home (and she's ALWAYS been excellent about going right to bed). So when it was time, she knew it and she gave in.

Sunday to come...

Thursday

Today

Today I got to have lunch with a fantastic friend. I never take a lunch...and it was nice to take the time to spend just me and her.

I hope to do it again soon :)

Wednesday

A Proud Member of the BHCC

For those of you wondering what in the world the BHCC is...

It's the Big Honkin' Chickens Club, of which I am a proud member. :) Since I scare easily, but still continue to press on with my novel, Eyes of Elisha, I truly am a BHCC member :). Everyone needs to check out this book. I am halfway through and it has made it so difficult to put down at the end of the night! I'm now going to be getting every one of Brandilyn Collins novels...though I hate being scared, I LOVE scary books! :)

Check out her site:
http://brandilyncollins.com/bhcc.html

Note the awesome graphic to the right....It makes me smile!

Tuesday

Confession #78

I am a big chicken. An even bigger chicken than I realized!

I was sitting on the couch Saturday night, Bob wasn't home yet, it was after 9:00, and I was reading a book I got from Praises...a Christian fiction...suspense about a murder. And I am enthralled with this book. It got really detailed, and I felt like I was there with the woman who was frantically trying to run away...Suddenly I became very very aware of the fact that it's now dark outside and the curtains are open and the windows are open and I'm alone. I couldn't even look at the windows! I tried calling Bob on his cell 5 times and he wouldn't answer! I was getting more and more creeped out. I couldn't even get off the couch because I felt like any movement would draw something my way....Then the phone rang...As soon as it rang, I picked it up, assuming it was Bob. Nope. It was Brad from church. I felt so dumb! I took comfort of the fact I was on the phone with SOMEONE and hurried up and got off the couch and went into the dining room, where I could see anyone coming from outside, yet was still fairly well hidden. Thankfully, not long after the phone rang, Bob pulled up. He wasn't allowed to leave my side for a good 15 minutes...and now I am only allowed to read the book when he's home. It's a really GOOD book though. Eyes of Elisha by Brandilyn Collins. GOOD GOOD book!

What can I say? I've always been a little over-dramatic!

2008 Blog Results....

This made me giggle. This is the keyword search for my blog for 2008 so far. These are the things people search for....the peeing blog still cracks me up! What in the WORLD are people looking for with that??? :)

Keyword Visits Percent
peeing blog 99 15.07%
matt and chelsea 54 8.22%
worship verse 46 7.00%
made to worship 29 4.41%
pee worship 25 3.81%
matt chelsea 18 2.74%
worship verses 13 1.98%
made to worship verse 9 1.37%
keep your eyes on Jesus lyrics 8 1.22%
dippin strips 8 1.22%
Total 657 100.00%

Thursday

More Maleah Pics :)

Pouting because we told her "NO" to touching the AEP meter...


Just haning out...


Ready for a swim! :)

Be Still...

Psalm 46:10
“Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.”

"Be still, and know that I am God..."

Some of the most powerful words I have ever heard. All worries can wash away because He IS God.

Please sit back, and allow these words to penetrate your heart with all their meaning.

Nothing is sweeter than when the Lord speaks to your heart...

Tuesday

While We Were Still Sinners

I was reading a verse the other night that caught my attention in a way that it hadn't before. Maybe it's silly of me...because it's been there the whole time...but sometimes you read something, or hear it, so many times that you don't even realize what it means anymore....

But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
-Romans 5:8 (NIV)

"While we were still sinners..."

How many people do we talk to about coming to church that say something such as "Yes, I really should start going again...", "If I get (insert bad habit, etc. here) taken care of, I'll start going to church again..." and on and on and on. Too many people in our world today think they need to be pefect walking through those church doors. I have to wonder why. Have we, as Christians, made them feel so unwelcome that they feel so judged walking into the church? If so, then we need to re-evaluate ourselves. We most certainly are not perfect. Not even a little bit. Christ died for us while we were still sinners. He doesn't expect us to be perfect. He doesn't expect us to be clean. He just expects us to come to Him. HE will make us perfect. HE will make us clean. We just have to trust Him...and believe...

Maleah

It's been awhile since I posted pics of Maleah...She's more beautiful than ever before...with TONS of personality! Here she is:





Monday

Me Thinking Aloud...in Writing...

I have decided I want to do everything I can to supress my negativity. I was a much happier person when I didn't see all the bad in the world around me. There's alot of bad. ALOT. Bob and I were talking the other day about how I was happier when I worked as a secretary because I was constantly dealing with clients, so I couldn't dwell in my bad mood because I had to put a smile on for them, and then by the end of the day I was actually in a good mood. I need to get back to that. I sit in my office and don't see many people, so it's easy to get lost in the quiet and think about things I don't want to think about. I've decided that I will not focus on the negative...that I will be positive...and in turn I SHOULD get back to being that positive person again.

My point in telling you this? Accountability. We all need it. You can be mine. Don't let me dwell on the negative either. Life's too short...and believe it or not...there are good things going on as well as the bad... :)

Our youth group is doing this study on Experiencing God....I missed the last week of it because Maleah was sick...but the study was on this same sort of topic. Too many times something bad happens to us...or something we don't expect...and we let it take over us, instead of seeing what God will bring out of it. The example used was the writer found out his daughter had cancer. They had everyone praying for her, and when they went back for additional testing it was gone. They could have asked "Why? Why God did you allow this to happen?" But they didn't. They had people pray and what happened as a result? The people they spoke with to pray talked about how they had a dry prayer life, and their praying for her revived something in their relationship with the Lord. So as a result of the early testing, many people's relationships were renewed.

I don't tell it so well, but it was an amazing story. It shows us that if we step back, follow God and allow Him to take control....good things will come out of bad situations.

Amen to that.

Thursday

Confession #77

Talking to Becky today made me remember a confession to tell about quickly.

A friend of ours is in Australia on her honeymoon for 2 weeks and I have received two emails from her. This led us to a conversation about contacting family/friends during the "honeymoon" time...

Mine and Bob's "honeymoon" was nothing more than a one-night stay at the local Christopher Inn...

The entire time we were there we were just YARDS away from my mom and dad's...we were just a few yards longer away from our apartment...It was ONE NIGHT.

By the time we went to the apartment on Sunday I was in tears wanting to go see my mom. I cried entering my mom's house...because I was already homesick! I have no idea how in the world I was homesick when I was RIGHT THERE...but I was.

Poor Bob...he never knew what he got himself into...

Wednesday

Rant - If Offended, Apologize Later :)

You know...so many people are afraid to say so many things because they are afraid of stepping on toes...or offending...etc...

You know what? I'm done worrying about that.

90% of white women are not voting for Hillary Clinton.
90% of white men are not voting for John McCain.
SO why is it that in NC & IN, 90+% of the black vote went to Obama??? (I think the percentages are similar in other states but I don't have facts on that)

I'm disgusted that people can't look past color...on either side...I won't vote AGAINST a person because of their skin color, and I won't vote FOR them because of it either.

I'm not a Hillary supporter because I'm a woman...

If Obama were a white man, he wouldn't be in the race. He is a Freshman Senator with little experience. People would have laughed him out a long time ago. But...somehow...he's still there...

I don't want Obama.
I don't want Hillary.
I don't want McCain.

I will, however, vote in November. I will vote for the person that I feel is best suited for the position with the highest qualifications after thoroughly analyzing their voting records and stances on social & economic issues, as well as immigration, border patrol, etc...My vote in November will NOT be for what's on the outside.

Yours shouldn't be either.

Monday

Good Day...

It's been a good day. :) Nice and quiet for me to get my work done. Stacy got me a card, Bobby called, Bec got me dark chocolate hershey kisses that I don't have to share with ANYONE and a card, and we're having dinner at my mom and dad's tonight! Bob gave me a note, Maleah is just fantastic, and the day is only half over!

I'm so glad that I'm loved...and also glad that I don't have to think of dinner tonight! WHEW!

Confession #76

Today is my birthday...and I know it sounds dumb because I'm only 27...but I am sad. My youngest days have passed. Lucky for me, Bec said a few weeks ago that 50 is the new 40...so would that mean that 27 is the new 17??? :) Then again, I wasn't crazy about being 17. I just see myself inching closer and closer to 30 and then I won't be a young 20-something anymore :(

I'm sure you all feel SOOOOO bad for me right now ;)

Thursday

Confession #75

Tom Selleck...

When I was three I told my mom that I wanted to take all his clothes off and kiss him all over. Ok, now, have you SEEN Tom Selleck!? What in the WORLD was I thinking!?

I'm so sorry Bob, my taste DEFINATELY improved :)

Who does Maleah look like?

MyHeritage: Look-alike Meter - Dynasty - Geneology

Bye, Bye....Mustache????

I have been wanting to blog on this all week, and no, it's not about Tom Selleck, if that's what you were thinking (which I doubt you were because that is just on an episode of Friends when "Richard" shaves off his mustache....wow, I can't believe I just typed that nonsense). Reminds me of a confession....another post....in a minute :)

Ok, back to the mustache....

My dad has shaved off his mustache! That is the FIRST time I've seen that upper lip...EVER! It's a little pale and needs a tan :)

After 35 years....the mustache is gone!

WOW! THAT is dedicated facial hair! Well....until it starts to turn white! How dedicated could it possibly be then???

Ok. I'm leaving now!

Wednesday

Confession #74

When we were little, Nicole had this plastic see-through beach bag with flamingos on it. It was clear and round and had a pull string at the top. I just had to have one too. I ALWAYS had to be like Nicole. So I got one! Then we made our plans with them. We couldn't take them to the beach because we weren't going, so we decided we were going to run away.

There was a cornfield behind our house still at that time, and we were going to pack cans of soup in our bags and run away into the cornfield.

Who knows where in the world we planned to go...the river was on the other side.

However, we decided not to go....I don't remember why, but I'm sure it had SOMETHING to do with no more mac n cheese! ;)

Friday

Emily's Tree

Here are a few more pics of Emily's tree:

(This one is our favorite):


Thursday

Idol Worship

"Idol worship" took on a whole new meaning last night as the contestants fnished the night of Idol Gives Back with "Shout to the Lord". I loved it! It was so awesome to hear a worship song sung on American Idol! They took out "Jesus" and replaced it with "Shepherd"....but there is no denying this major worship song. This song is sung in churches all across the nation every week, and to hear it on Idol....AMAZING!

I've been thoroughly pleased with this season...from Jason singing "Hallelujia" to Dolly Parton's songs about Jesus to "Shout to the Lord". It's been awesome.

:)

Tuesday

Emily's Tree...

Has it's first flower!!! I am SO EXCITED! I have waited 2 years for this! It's beautiful! Absolutely BEAUTIFUL!

I'll post pictures when Bob gets them on the computer! :)

Monday

Don't you just love....

that feeling of KNOWING without a DOUBT that your prayer was just answered?!

I'm here at work and there's a particular account that I am having difficulty with. I emailed Bob and told him I needed him to pray for me to have wisdom on the account so that I could get it done and move on to other things. Within the hour my problem was figured out down to the penny! Everything fell into place, God moved mountains and the account is done.

6434.14 is a beautiful number to me! :)

I so many times forget to ask God for help at work....like He doesn't fit or it's silly to ask. But it's not. I asked, Bob prayed too, and He listened!

I want to run around and tell everyone what He did just now. I can't (it's tax time and I'd be killed) but still, just knowing He spoke to me in that manner, is AMAZING!

Confession #73

Our newspaper read (I don't know if it still does, but I assume it does) "First newspaper west of the Alleghenies".

So I'm sitting at the table (a teenager) and tell my mom "hehe, we're the first paper west of the ... (let me spell it out the way I said it ...)a leg and knees!" I got a big kick out of that word!

No one ever told me anything in school about the Allegheny Mountains! Let alone how to pronounce it! Looks like 'a leg and knees' to me!

Also, I thought Socrates was 'so crates'....just like Bill & Ted.

Sometimes I don't know how I function!

Jasmine is....

Gone!

Thanks to Bobby and his girlfriend, Nicole, Jasmine has a new home as of Saturday afternoon! Nicole's mom took her. I hope she is doing well over there. She's not too fond of change, but she's a good cat.

Thanks again, guys!

Maleah doesn't know what to do now that she is allowed to go in the laundry room and down the hallway! :)

Friday

Confession #72

Unless there is a time in my life when I was little that I don't remember....

A couple of weeks ago Bob and I went through a drive-thru car wash on Western Ave. and it was my first time going through a drive-thru car wash. Bob is completely baffled at this. But my dad always washed our cars himself. And my mom and I would take her Lumina through the car wash on Bridge and they send it through for you.

So I was a drive-thru car wash virgin for almost 27 years....

It was freaky. Not looking forward to the next time!

Monday

Maleah....

I haven't had any time on here for anything (except to try to get rid of my cat) :) Who ... by the way ... is still up for grabs. :) Ok, enough of that.

Maleah.

Had her first Easter egg hunt yesterday. She hated walking in the grass. She didn't mind the porch. She found a few eggs and was really good about putting them in her bag. Diego was her favorite of course (he's her boyfriend) :)

She was beautiful in her dress! The dress came from Stacy...it was Kaitlyn's last year. I didn't think she'd like it, but she did just fine. It was fun watching her watch her feet as she walked...they kept disappearing behind the dress and she'd bend over to look for them. She's so silly!

It was a good day. A good weekend. I love her so much and just watching her as she does what she does is amazing to me. She is my girl. :)

Here she is in her dress:





This is one of my favorites!

Thursday

Jasmine

Free for the taking.
Just a reminder...we are trying to find Jasmine a new home.
She's a good, clean indoor cat.
If you would like her, or even know someone who takes in cats to find new homes for them, please let us know!!!

Wednesday

Winter Weather Blues...

Well, I was enjoying the beautiful and warm wonderful day that we had on Monday (Sunday too). We were able to take a walk Sunday (Maleah loves being 'outside'). Monday I worked all day with my window open and the wonderful breeze blowing in. I felt ALIVE again. Then yesterday hit...and today continued...and it will continue to do so. Those days are painful...the ones that remind you of what's to come...yet you know they aren't here to stay. I love smelling the warm fresh air. I miss it. It makes these days even harder to get through. March is my least favorite month I think. I always thought it was January or February...but it's March. Because it has the most teaser days within it.

It's depressing...I've snacked more since yesterday morning than I had the last 2 months! Apparently that cheers me up...because Krystle is bringing me back cookies from Max & Erma's! Yay!

I miss spring...I miss daylight. (Thank goodness for daylight savings this weekend!)

For those of you down south with 60 degree weather (even 50s)....don't take it for granted....You could be stuck up here!

Thursday

Untitled Rant...

I know I haven't been posting much AT ALL but I'll be back soon.

I wanted to rant a minute.

What is up with people acting like they are some sort of hero because they DON'T believe in God??? There are people that act so egotistical because they aren't "following the herd" yet by doing what they are doing they are doing JUST THAT. Are their ideas fresh, new, and original? No. They repeat the same things they are told over and over and over by their idols, the media and every other secular individual who doesn't want to feel guilty by their actions so they swear off God altogether.

I'm glad I'm not one of these individuals. Though I'm not always happy, I'm joyful. This world is NOT my home and I'm thankful because frankly this world SUCKS! I only hope that I can get back to where I should be, doing what I should be doing. It's been too long.

Thank you, Lord, for guiding me. I want to continue to listen. This world needs You...if only they would see it...

Friday

People Have Feelings

Sometimes I feel like God should have not given us tongues at all. Some people (men and women both...but in this case, men) just don't think about someone's feelings before they spout off at the mouth. They should stop and think "does this sound insensitive? mean? should I say this aloud?"...because what comes out probably sounds worse than intended...but it's still said...and still mean...

To those who have been hurt by words today...I apologize. We, as a society, just don't care about others like we should...But thankfully neither do we all see things the same way!

Wednesday

Read Me!

Malachi 3:3 says:

"He will sit as a refiner and
purifier of silver."


This verse puzzled some women in a Bible study and they wondered what this statement meant about the character and nature of God.

One of the women offered to find out the process of refining silver and get back to the group at their next Bible Study.

That week, the woman called a silversmith and made an appointment to watch him at work. She didn't mention anything about the reason for her interest beyond her curiosity about the process of refining Silver.

As she watched the silversmith, he held a piece of silver over the fire and let it heat up. He explained that in refining silver, one needed to hold the silver in the middle of the fire where the flames were hottest as to burn away all the impurities.

The woman thought about God holding us in such a hot spot; then she thought again about the verse that says: "He sits as a refiner and purifier of silver." She asked the silversmith if it was true that he had to sit there in front of the fire the whole time the silver was being refined.

The man answered yes, he not only had to sit there holding the silver, but he had to keep his eyes on the silver the entire time it was in the fire. If the silver was left a moment too long in the flames, it would be destroyed.

The woman was silent for a moment. Then she asked the silversmith, "How do you know when the silver is fully refined?"

He smiled at her and answered, "Oh, that's easy -- when I see my image in it."

If today you are feeling the heat of the fire , remember that God has his eye on you and will keep watching you until He sees His image in you.

Thanks Jaclyn for this email forward! :)

Sunday

One Cat, No Waiting!

Bob and I have been back and forth and back and forth.

We have made a decision.

Jasmine needs a new home.

Don't know with who, or when...but she definately does. It just seems like it'd be best for all 3 of us.

So...if you know anyone who wants a good cat who sleeps alot and alerts you when you have someone around your house...let us know!

Saturday

Hatin' the T.V.

The other day I took Maleah to Stacy's like any other morning...only that particular morning she was glued to the TV almost as soon as we got there. I went to tell her goodbye, and she was gripping the TV stand so tight it was hard to get her to let go. THEN she proceeded to scream and throw a fit, trying her hardest to look around me to see the TV. I told her I will NOT tolerate her throwing fits over the TV. She maybe didn't understand...but my intentions are very clear.

Today I turned it on Noggin to see what she would do. We never turn the TV on for her at home. We do turn it on, but it's usually on news or the weather...and she never really pays attention. She dropped her toy, went to the TV and stared without moving for about 2 minutes. I then turned it off...deciding she didn't need it on. She proceeded to scream and object my turning it off. All the more reason to keep it that way.

I don't mind if she wants to watch it...but I will NOT have her throwing fits over it!

And lately...she's been throwing lots of them! Must be the age she's at....OY! :)